g.r.o.w.

Inspired by my recent visit to the "Garden School", my recent bedside reading material (see sidebar),and the bugs ongoing love of digging in the dirt, we bought some peat pots and seeds and got ready to garden. Beans, peas, pumpkins,and watermelon started by the big bug. Tomatoes for me.



They took off quickly. Now we have to build these.


(torn from an old issue of Sunset but found again here.)

Add carrots, basil, sunflowers, parsley... And convince spring to arrive!

How does your garden grow?

Self-Portrait Tuesday - Time.2

Our morning routine is pretty regular. Monday thru Friday the little bug wakes me up at 6:00. She cries for her sister and I explain that she needs to let her sleep. She asks for her dada and I tell her he left before she woke. (D leaves the house at 5:50 now so that he can take the bus over the hill to be at the museum by 7:00.) The big bug is up by 6:30. She immediately takes her spot in the sun on the sofa and leafs through a book before joining her little sister at the breakfast table. It is usually cereal. Though waffles have seen a rise in popularity rating lately. Especially with maple yoghurt. Milk for the girls. Green tea and oatmeal for me. The little bug likes a tablespoon of my oatmeal dabbed beside whatever she is eating.

Saturday and Sunday they rise with their dad and like to sit on the counter while he grinds the coffee beans. This past Sunday they brought me breakfast in bed as a special treat.

It was a treat - but my quiet mornings in the sun with them during the week are my favorite times.

You can see all the pics taken Wednesday through Tuesday here.

And more Self-Portraits here.

w h i r l

noun
1. The act of rotating or revolving rapidly. 2. Something, such as a cloud of dust, that whirls or is whirled. 3. A state of confusion; tumult. 4. A swift succession or round of events: the social whirl. 5. A state of mental confusion or giddiness; dizziness: My head is in a whirl.

All of the above.

The weekend flew by. As they seem to do now. Friday picked up the big bug early to drop off an application at a charter school we are very interested in. It is a lottery - so wish us luck. Then off for a haircut and the requisite french braids she loves. (I must learn to do this!) Saturday full of birthday parties and family get-togethers (so nice to be together) and Sunday going to church, playing catch-up with the laundry and taking in a Purim Carnival. (Yes, we did win two new fish!)

What did you do this weekend?

Let's hope the week goes by a little more slowly...

Corners of Our Home 6

I am running out of corners. At least corners that are one's I want to photograph and share.

Can a chair be a corner? I guess if one could - then this would be the one. Again, acquired through D's family. We have somewhat of a love/hate relationship with this chair. We often speak of "getting rid of it" - it is large and hard to place in our space - but in the end I don't think we will ever part with it. I can't imagine what D's Dad was thinking when he purchased this - besides "How cool would this be..." It has speakers inside but isn't currently hooked up to our system. (To me it just seems to demand to be hooked up to a turntable and not anything but...) And it is a wonderful orange. (I ♥ orange!)

It is virtually impossible to hold a conversation with anyone while sitting in this chair. It is a reading corner, a quiet corner, a knitting corner, a late-night after the kid's are asleep TV watching corner... A corner that attracts everyone who as ever entered this room. A corner that many have been photographed in...



More corners here.

International Women's Day

My dear friend reminded me of this. I am on a bit of a media fast and had completely forgotten. But it is important to take (at least) a day to remember. It seems timely - and somewhat frightening - this year to remember where we should not be going. What legacy am I creating for my daughters? What more should I be doing? How do we ensure that we move forward instead of back?

Self-Portrait Tuesday - Time

These were shot this morning. It always amazes me how much / how little I can get done in a short amount of time. Here 1hr 7mins. And we are out the door...

I like this theme of TIME a lot. Last month's got the best of me and I didn't make it through to the end! This is a bit more fun - more ideas. We will see where it takes me.

More Self-Portraits here.

monday monday

I am having trouble writing anything today. I just delete then start again. It is grey and cloudy and I am tired from the weekend! Not too much got done. And now here we are at Monday.

It may be that I had my first mammogram today. I'm 35 but my doctor advised me to do it now, instead of waiting until 40 given my family history. (Both my maternal grandmother and aunt are breast cancer survivors and my aunt was quite young when she was diagnosed.) I am not a pessimist. I don't think much about my own mortality - or of those around me for that matter. Maybe it was losing my dad so suddenly. I try and cherish each day (try!) and not to worry about things I have no control over. I do eat healthy (organic where we can) and exercise (not often enough) and do all those things one should but I know that there is still a chance that "something" can go wrong and that I don't want to spend my time worrying about what that may be.

And it was so much less painful than I thought it would be. And certainly worth it. (Did you know that a mammogram can detect a lump up to two years before it would be felt by a physical exam?) An ounce of prevention as they say... Anyone who has any apprehensions about going through with it shouldn't. I think the worst part was trying to make small talk with the technician about Canadian beer while standing there with my shirt off and my (still!) post-pregnancy diastasis belly hanging over my belt!! My doctor will review the films and be in touch in a few days.

happy monday.

and from Missouri to California!

The girls were thrilled with their miniswap packages which we picked up from the postoffice on Saturday morning. (An ordeal in itself! I thought I had packed our pick-up slip into another box I was posting and hoped that the post-officer could find our package without it but they couldn't so I opened it only to find it wasn't there which meant taking both kids back out the door across the busy parking lot and around the side of the block where we had parked because the parking lot had been full, digging around the van where I found and old piece of string cheese, an abandoned sippy cup and a vast quantity of breakfast cereal before finding the aforementioned claim slip, trudged back into the post office and got back in line where the officer - thankfully - recognized me and let us come to her window to get our packages - which turned out to be two packages! whew.)

The girls could barely wait to get home to open their packages! The "glitter storms" as the big bug calls them were the biggest hits - as were the purses, the too cute notebooks made from paperbags with stickers and gel pen too, the fishing game, the mystery paintings... So much care and thought put into everything! oh and the bracelets how could I forget the bracelets I can't get off my daughters' wrists! Thanks so much Shannon and family. I hope our package made it to you safely! And a big thanks to Molly too for organizing everything! This was a lot of fun for all of us!

from California to Missouri!

Our miniswap package is off! Hope it has a safe trip!

(I'll reveal the contents once I know it has arrived!)

Lots of other fun things miniswapped here!

Update 03.07! Our package has arrived! You can see more here and here too! We included mystery rocks (playdough-ish rocks with plastic dinosaurs inside, aprons recycled from an old denim shirt, homemade soap with a plastic rat in the middle, sock puppets,t-shirts with drawings by the big bug to color with washable crayons, hair "pretties", pencil and pencil sharpener, California poppy seeds to sow when spring arrives!.. This was all so much fun!

"The day will come, when a single carrot, freshly observed, will set off a revolution." - Cezanne

I went on an amazing tour today. A formidable project taken on by a cast that includes Emily Green , Nancy Silverton and Nancy Goslee Power among others. The Garden School Foundation's work at the 24th Street Elementary School is an inspiration. Oh to dream of a day when all children can run and play and explore and LEARN in a school yard full of native plants, vegetables, and shade trees. So far only the staff parking lot has been turned over into a garden. A wonderful experimental area to see what works best for the kids, teachers, and community at large. Hard to believe that anyone would prefer a parking lot to this...



This project is to be a template for other LAUSD schools and I dream of bringing it to our neighborhood. A girl (mom, community and education activist, environmental optimist) can / should dream.

For more inpiration check out:

The Boston Schoolyard Initiative (How cool is this?!)

Treepeople (I have yet to be one but still plan on it!)

LADWP's Cool Schools program (A start...)

and of course Alice Water's famous Edible Schoolyard (The importance and success of this program, and it looks like the Garden School program is that there is an implemented plan for success. Not just planting and moving on...)

Is there anything like this happening in your community? I would love to learn more...

*************

Looking forward to sunny skies and getting some spring cleaning done before the rains start up again Sunday night... This week has flown by.

Corners of Our Home 5

If I came with a lot of books - then D came with a lot of music. Guitars, CDs, lots of vinyl and this piano.

This is our music corner. Amps ready for an impromptu jam around the piano. This is the piano D took lessons on as a boy. Bought by his Bubbie so that her grandchildren would be blessed by music. It has been touched by many many little hands. Gently and not so gently. The bench is long gone. But when it was offered to us by D's sister we didn't hesitate. D even built a wall for it to go up against so that it would have a proper place in our little house.

I took lessons too, for many years. Many hours of practicing chords and scales and pieces I never thought I would want to play. Now I am so glad that I can. And I look forward to the bugs complaints about practicing as I complained to my mom.

See more corners here.

breakfast for dinner

I wish I had taken a picture of our dinner last night.

When I suggested to the big bug we have pancakes in honour of Shrove Tuesday she said "For real???!!" Light and fluffy - thanks to Trader Joe's Buttermilk Pancake Mix - we devoured them with sausages and maple syrup. mmmm. Which got me to thinking - Why do we eat pancakes on Shrove Tuesday? I only know that as a kid we always went to the big pancake dinner at church before Ash Wednesday. It turns out that Shrove Tuesday aka Mardi Gras (which translates to "Fat Tuesday") is historically the day you rid your house of fat in preparation of Lent. It is traced back to 15th century England where people were expected to use up butter, lard and eggs before beginning their fast.

By the way, Shrove comes from the term "shriven". To be shriven is to confess and to be forgiven which is also a pre-Lenten tradition. The church bells that ring out on Shrove Tuesday - calling the parishioners to confess - have become known as "pancake bells".

rain delay

We got the downpour as predicted. Lot of puddling going on! But I also haven't got to the post office yet. (I do not like to drive in the rain more than I have to...)So our miniswap package is sitting waiting. The sun is shining right now but word is another system is on its way. Don't worry - the goodies will be on their way too!



Update: Looks like the storm has passed. I am always awed by the blue of the sky here after a good rain. So fresh... The quality of light is lovely.

Must photograph miniswap and get to the postoffice while the sun shines!!

splish splash

finally. after over a month of showers and bathing in the kitchen sink. my kids are clean again! the bath was installed over the weekend. and while the room is without lighting, running water, and proper walls for that matter,(thanks to papa for hauling all those buckets!), the two bugs still had a bath. and loved it. could barely get them out of it...

Corners of Our Home 4

While not really a corner - there are a lot of corners present. When D and I married he understood that I came with a lot of books. A lot. This is just one of the many bookcases he has built into the house to accommodate them. I am not fond of clutter (though find it everywhere lately!) but do love the look of full bookshelves. Next to it is our little gallery. Curated by the bugs.



See more corners here.

dancing Maria

Had a quiet but productive weekend. Made it extra long with taking yesterday off too. We toured a charter school (a kindergarten possibility) that really impressed us, and in the afternoon I took the big bug to Nanny McPhee (really darling - and so many great knitted sweaters / vests!). I always worry about taking her to the movies. (She is 4 1/2 and sitting through it isn't the problem - but the loud sounds and her sensitivity to "scary" situations are.) This was only our second go at it and the PG rating put me off. But she insisted she wanted to see it - and really seemed to enjoy it. Especially all the "naughty" behaviour of the children.

We also had a birthday to attend on Sunday for our little neighbor S who turned 3. The big bug really wanted me to "make something!" and had been hounding me to try a cat from Denyse Schmidt Quilts. She carefully chose some fabric from our limited stash then helped me piece it together. She was in charge of putting her foot down on the pedal as we sewed her together. On completion she named her "Maria" (as in the Nutcracker) and decided she needed a tutu. Then S needed a matching tutu. The result was this



which the big bug had no trouble modeling before we wrapped it up...

You can see more photos of Maria here.

Now to finish up our Mini Swap...

L I F E

as usual today, just a little sadder.
It is four years since my dad died unexpectedly.
I miss him.







Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves ...
Don't search for the answers,
which could not be given to you now,
because you would not be able to live them.
And the point is, to live everything.
Live the questions now.
Perhaps then, someday far in the future,
you will gradually, without even noticing it,
live your way into the answer.
- rainer maria rilke

Corners of Our Home 3

This is what the little bug is looking at when she falls asleep at night. This is what the little bug first sees when she wakes in the morning. The painting is from D's time at art school. Painted from a stuffed chicken as a model. The mobile was a gift from a dear friend who found it at the Portland Saturday Market. The little bug loves to make all the noises of the animals flying above her as she drifts off. We moved her into a "big girl bed" quite early. She was just 16 months old. The crib was no longer for her. She shares a room with her big sister and wanted a bed just the same. She actually sleeps better in it than she ever did in the crib. And now can awake in the morning, pad over to my bedside and awaken me with kisses.

See more corners here.

Self-Portrait Tuesday - All of Me #2

I am a mom, wife, lover, daughter, sister, aunt, cook, gardener, artist, writer, clown, nurse, tea-drinker, doctor, niece, decorator, collector, designer, comic, tear-wiper, nose-blower, giggler, booboo-kisser, granddaughter, storybook-reader, beginning knitter, muse, seamstress, arguer, driver, hand-holder, actress, errand-runner, assistant, listener, bad dancer, too-much-chocolate-consumer, procrastinator, talker, friend. All of me.

More Self-Portraits here.

happy heart day

cozy

Had a lovely weekend in Big Bear. A little too short. And a little too hectic. But the big bug loved loved loved tubing down the hill with her dad. Laughing in that free way that brings tears to my eyes.

Corners of Our Home 2

This is normally the quiet corner of our house. It is the seat my mom seems to prefer when she comes to visit. Lots of stories read here. Trying to get lots of knitting done here - though a story on a lap takes precedent. This house is so much about light. Again, it is the light of this corner, especially in the morning, that I love.

And the chair. I love this chair. It came to us from my in-laws. As did so much of our furniture and furnishings. D's parents had taste. It is a Milo Baughman design. The matching ottoman is long gone. Victim to too much rough-housing on the part of my husband and his brothers. We reupholstered it after rescuing it, the original vinyl torn, with this wonderful fabric. So soft - in color and touch. It is a comfortable spot.

There is a birds nest just outside this window. In the tight space between the roof and the chimney. Every year since we moved in, a family of birds has called this home. Every year there are new babies. Every year we watch to see them exit the nest and take their first careful sojourns around our backyard. I was worried that recent roofing and painting would disturb them, but they are still there. And spring is around the corner...

See more corners here.

ragbag

We had a flood in the studio at work, and as I sorted through some painting rags in a box I came across this dress. The label reads "Hawaiian Paradise" and I hope to reinvent it as a skirt. I love the fabric. It doesn't seem terribly "Hawaiian" to me - or is there something I don't know?

Self-Portrait Tuesday - All of Me #1

One of the first things I was taught while studying for my degree in Art Conservation was that raking light showed all the imperfections. A painting could look perfect in carefully set-up lighting, but once you put a raking light across the surface the cracks, creases, past damages, past corrections, the effects of time, would often come, well, to light.

I am not completely comfortable with the whole idea of aging - with the effects of time. I sometimes can't believe I am 35. Then I look back at what I have experienced. Where I have been. At my husband. At my two amazing, beautiful daughters, who themselves are growing older. I have done all this. It has taken time.

More Self-Portraits here.

Home(work)

A quiet weekend passed by too quickly once again. We had grand plans of preparations for our bathtub which is to arrive tomorrow and set us on our way from this

to this


Instead, we spent Saturday thrifting (or trying to) while the little bug and I battled head colds. We did come away with a raincoat for the big bug which she loves.

Sunday morning it was hard to get out of bed, and when we did we puttered around doing some yard work while D finished the new blue door for the bathroom and started working on the leaking return line for the pool. It really is always something with this house...

Can't wait to see the new tub. All the fixtures too. It really will be a transformation, and testament to D's talent and hard work.

Corners of our Home

This is my first post relating to Amanda's wonderful Corners of My Home pool on Flickr.

This is probably the busiest corner in our house. And rarely does it look this quiet - or tidy! The corner bench was one of the first things Papa built for the house when we moved in. Originally there was a door to the right, and between it and the window were the hook-ups for a washer and drier. The narrow galley kitchen had nowhere to sit - a priority in a kitchen for me, as it seems to be the spot where all my friends and family end up when they visit. We converted an unused storage area into a laundry room, removed the door (which adjoins a door onto the outdoor breezeway anyway, so was a bit redundant) and inserted this. It is wonderful. All storage drawers underneath full of art supplies and cookie cutters! It is where we eat almost every meal. It is where most activities take place. It is where games are played and stories told. In the morning it receives a perfect sunbeam. We still have a little work to do on it. The wiring for the light fixture needs to be redone (hidden) and the clock moved. And it is in the works this spring to re-plant the yard, including doing something outside this window so there is more to look at than fence.

See more corners here.

Makes you think...

From this article in the most recent edition of London's Sunday Times:

So why are children now doing so badly? Possible explanations are numerous. Youngsters don’t get outside for hands-on play in mud, sand and water — and sandpits and water tables have been squeezed out in many primary schools by a relentless drilling of the three Rs and cramming 11- year-olds for the national tests.

“By stressing the basics — reading and writing — and testing like crazy you reduce the level of cognitive stimulation. Children have the facts but they are not thinking very well,” says Adey. “And they are not getting hands-on physical experience of the way materials behave.”

Ginsburg says parents too can do their bit. “When did children stop playing with mud, plasticine and Meccano and start playing with Xboxes and computer games?” she asks. Parents should switch off the television and “sit children around the dinner table to debate issues such as ‘What should we have done about the whale in the Thames?’ ” says Adey.

If these experts are right — and our children are losing the ability to think, the burning question is: what is the value of what they are being taught in primary school and of all those test results that every year rise to new heights?...

Not so different than this side of the pond is it?

Gramma Fish RIP

It had been a great source of pride in our house that we owned goldfish that were over 2 years old. They were a gift for the big bug's 2nd birthday and, against the advice of the gentleman at the petstore, we kept them in a simple bowl, cleaning it out once a week. They thrived. We did have a bout of "ick", but that cleared up quite nicely with some fish antibiotic. They were happy fish - I think. Especially fond of Papa (who fed them regularly but judiciously) and the big bug. She named them "Eleanor" and "Gramma" and would have tea parties with them, and even play hide-and-seek, when they were willing. (They would always be told to count while she hid.) Sunday morning we awoke to find only one fish left in the bowl. The other had, sadly, jumped for joy one last time, landing on the floor beside the little Parsons table where their bowl was placed. There were tears. And the big bug took her time deciding what fate the dearly departed would take. (We gave her the options of burial vs. flushing.) She decided on flushing (as "fish belong in the water not in the dirt") and that night we held a simple ceremony. And down she went.

The next morning we went out to the petstore again. Big bug was worried Eleanor would be lonely. (Eleanor was always the yang to Gramma's ying.) We found a little orange and white friend whom was immediately named Lucy.

They seem to be getting along well. But Gramma is still missed.

Update January 31,2006
Came home from work today to find little Lucy had passed. The big bug was much more stoic this time. The memorial service was brief and uneventful... Think we will see how Eleanor does on her own for a while...

Update to the update February 1, 2006
Today Eleanor joined Gramma and Lucy. More tears. Thinking maybe Lucy brought with her some sort of virus. Anyway, sad day.

My daughter, the crocodile huntress

The big bug (age 4) has taken to drawing crocodiles on our driveway since our return from Australia where she learned they roam. This one, she told me, is entering her net - but she will set it free...

and I have taken to posting photos of cookie cutters at at another Flickr group. This one comes from a set of circus animals passed on by my mother-in-law. You can see more here.

School Rant

My close friends have already heard this from me. More than once. But here I go again...

I am having such a difficult time organizing my thoughts on the big bug's departure to kindergarten this September. She has her heart set on attending our neighborhood school. I believe her only reason is because it is our neighborhood school. The school she sees whenever we go for a walk. Where the children play that we can hear from our yard. We attended the holiday pageant, and were fortunate to meet the librarian and receive a "complimentary tour" of the library. The big bug was smitten. All those books. And all those smiling faces singing holiday songs. Who wouldn't be?

My dilemma is this: I don't think this school is meeting its potential. (Through no fault of the staff, but rather through lack of funding and lack of community support.) I don't know if it will be able to help her reach her potential. I am unsure if it will even be able to maintain her (right now) seemingly unlimited curiosity (that I love so much).

I, like her, love the concept of the neighborhood school. Walking to school each day. Meeting playmates that live nearby. Pride in community. All those things.

But, unfortunately, as is so common in schools in this city and others, the neighborhood chose some time ago, for a variety of reasons, not to attend this school. To attend private schools. In turn, the school suffered. And in turn, less people in the neighborhood attended it. Besides private schools, favors were called in and children of our neighborhood went on to attend "better" public schools in adjacent neighborhoods. Parents of our neighborhood joined these PTAs and Booster Clubs and supported these schools instead of the one down the street. Somewhere along the line "we" forgot that for the school to be part of our community - we need to be part of the school. I understand why parents make these choices. I understand why one would want their child to go to the best possible place for their education. But why doesn't anyone seem to see that this school down the street could be that place with their support? How do we fix this cycle?

I have thought about "un-schooling". While the concept is incredibly attractive to me, in our current situation it just isn't right for us. And isn't an idea that appeals to our social butterfly of a daughter, who has been lucky enough to attend a fabulous preschool. I have looked at Charter Schools and will submitting an application (it is a lottery process) to one of these. And I have called on someone with a connection to a neighboring school if it comes to that. I so hope it doesn't. I want to make this work. I want to work with the community to make the school on my corner the best it can be. To help make the kids in my neighborhood the best they can be.

I can go on. How has America allowed the failure of what should be its priority - educating our children? (Maybe I find it easy to lay blame as I am Canadian - but my bugs are American.) Why can't our neighborhood school afford to buy a new copy machine? Is the funding from the school district so tight? Music, art, physical education. All these programs have been cut back. Why do we accept the use in public schools of a mediocre reading program to teach our kids to read while ignoring great literature that would "turn them on" to reading? (Here is a teacher who has "turned them on", and in LAUSD even!) How did this happen? Well, we know how. But why did we let it?? I don't want to let it go any further...

Now. Where to start...

Self-Portrait Tuesday - Personal History #2

This is my dad and I - sitting at the piano at his mother's, my grandmother's, house here. My dad grew up in this small town. On a farm. Met my mom in this small town. At a dance. It was felt at first she was too young to date this wild young man. But time passed. And soon she was "old enough". They married. Raised two kids. Had a lovely life. Cut too short. They had been married 37 years when he died. They had been together more years of their lives than they had been apart.

I love the way Dad is looking at me in this photo. I always felt he was looking over me. Protecting me. I still do. I still can feel the weight of his hand on my shoulder when I need it most.

More Self-Portraits here.

Home again home again

We are back. And all the realities that go with a return have settled in!

We had a wonderful trip. Very emotional at times. We were visiting my nephew, who turned 10 while we were there, and whom I hadn't seen since he was 4. It is hard with that much distance. Especially given that his parents are divorced, and his father (my brother) is in Canada, and he is with his mother in Australia. He is a wonderful wonderful boy and I am so happy that we had some time together. We will not let that much time pass before we are together again.

Now I am home to a one bathroom house, where there used to be two. Papa has taken on the enormous task of redoing the master bath, and took it down to the studs while we were away. Originally he was to have the tub installed before our return but with ordering mishaps the tub is now not due to arrive until the first week of February. Oh how I look forward to long long soaks very soon...

In the meantime, the big bug is quite enjoying the idea of taking a shower, while the little bug goes around unwashed (she does not enjoy the shower concept at all, nor the kitchen sink - sigh) until gracious friends allow us to bathe her in their tub!

It is good to be home!

Good-bye G'day

The bugs and I are flying off to the land downunder. Will tell of all our adventures in two weeks. Until then...

Worth sharing

A dear dear dearest friend left this in the comments. And I just want to make sure it is seen. Definately worth the read.

Self-Portrait Tuesday - Personal History #1

This is a portrait of me and my brother. He is almost exactly 18 months my junior - minus 3 days. He is the one who most often has me falling off my chair with peals of laughter. He is generous. Kind. Exceptionally good with people. Adventurous. So much of our dad is in him.

Behind this picture - which I keep on the bookshelf built into our hallway - are books of short-stories by Canadian humourist / CBC regular / author Stuart Mclean. One of my dad's favorites. I think Vinyl Cafe Unplugged was one of the books he was reading when he died. It was in his backpack when my mom, brother and I were sorting through his things. Short days after he died at the hospital. Stuart Mclean can make me laugh almost as hard. I need that.

I was and am the "big sister". I never really realized what this meant until I watched it between my own two children. It is a strong role. Taken very seriously. Cautious. Bossy. But with the best intentions. There is so much to share. I think this photo shows that relationship quite clearly. And I hope that all that is my dad and my brother can be a little part of me and work to soften those strong, serious, bossy edges.

See more Self-Portraits here.